People Behind BIO | Jessica Stephens
Jessica Stephens
MENTOR + PARENT — FARGO, ND
What is your connection to BIO Girls?
I have been a mentor for 5 years, and am a mother of three participant daughters age 11, 13, and 15. My girls have been through BIO Girls at the Fargo, ND - Olivet site, Fargo, ND - Oak Grove site, and West Fargo, ND - Triumph site.
What drew you to become involved with BIO Girls?
I have always loved running. I was looking for an opportunity for my daughters to tie in my love of running with an opportunity for them to grow. I was on Facebook one day and I saw a post about BIO Girls and immediately reached out to Missy to ask where I could sign up! I loved the concept of tying in three valuable aspects of life: your mind, your body, and your spirit.
The BIO Girls mission is "to improve the self-esteem of adolescent girls through empowerment of self and service to others." How do you resonate with the mission?
The mission of BIO Girls resonates with me because it empowers girls by teaching them that they are created by God for a unique purpose. It applies scripture to real-life situations giving them tools that will carry them through adolescence and into adulthood.
Do you have an impact story from your involvement with BIO Girls?
I have so many… it's hard to choose just one!
One year I had a girl that I was mentoring and I realized that I was measuring success by running longer distances or speed. I was running in the 5K with her and was so excited about how fast she ran the first mile of it! I thought that she would feel successful because of how fast she ran. After the first mile, she really lost her steam and didn't want to carry on.
I thought, “how am I going to encourage her?”, and what we ended up doing was picking every single dandelion that we came across. I still didn't know if she was having any fun until we were about to finish, and she asked me, "am I going to get that medal?" and I responded “yes, because you’re going to finish this race!” She was so happy and excited to get the medal. I learned that for her, getting the medal was the success and picking the dandelions was the fun part of it for her. It taught me a lot about our differences. The journey is different for everyone, she gave me a big hug at the end and told me she had a lot of fun, so I was really grateful.
Did you have a favorite lesson that you found value in?
Again, there are so many that I love, but one that comes up again and again in my life is taking a safe risk or dangerous risk. Most of us are afraid of failing and I'm afraid that it might be embarrassing or I might not be good enough. Having that tool to ask myself, "Is this a safe risk or dangerous risk? What's the worst that can happen if I put my neck out there?" It also helps you identify when there is something that isn't a good idea. I use this lesson with my daughters at least weekly!
What changes have you seen in the girls you have mentored?
A 5K is a long way to run. At the beginning of the season, many participants have never even completed a mile without stopping! It’s rewarding to run alongside the girls each week and watch their confidence grow as their mileage increases. It’s so much more than just running. Completing the distance is challenging. This challenge allows girls to practice encouraging one another.
In the beginning, I can see that they feel shy or awkward about cheering for each other. By race day, the girls are shouting words of encouragement to their fellow BIO Girls at the top of their lungs! They are happy to see their friends succeed. In turn, they’ve experienced how wonderful it feels to be encouraged by others. My daughters, as a result of participating in BIO Girls, shout encouragement to every random jogger, walker, or biker we encounter!
In one sentence, how do you summarize what BIO Girls provides participants?
BIO Girls is a welcoming environment to grow in your confidence and take risks.
Mentoring is a big commitment. Why is it worth it to you?
I believe it’s important to carve out time in our lives to give back to others. When I first learned about BIO Girls I realized quickly that this is where I wanted to serve. I wanted my girls to participate and I wanted as many girls as possible to be able to do the program too.
Being a mentor has been so rewarding. The weekly meetings have given me an opportunity to grow my leadership skills as well as sweet friendships with the girls and mentors. Investing in one another is priceless!
What is one thing that surprised you about BIO Girls?
I was surprised how much I would take away from it as a mom and mentor. I initially signed the girls up because I wanted it for them, so they could experience growth in confidence and leadership skills, but as a result, I gained all of these tools as a mom.
Each lesson seems as if it was written for us as a family. Having three girls, I could relate the lessons directly to their experience. It was a wonderful teaching tool to be the best mom I could be. Sometimes you just don't know what kids are going through. But after BIO Girls each week, I have the opportunity to go through the lessons together with my girls and let them tell me what they talked about. This helped me to be a better mentor to my BIO Girls at our sessions, and it also prompts me to start conversations at home that we might not have had.
What changes have you seen in your daughters?
They have learned how to set a goal, persevere, and work towards that goal, and then reaching that goal. Running a 5K is a lot of work for those girls, and they have really pushed themselves for their goal. They are wonderful cheerleaders to others, because they have been in that situation where people have pulled them along. They also now know how to work really hard. The experience of pushing themselves while running has led to see how pushing yourself can pay off.
Why should other parents consider enrolling their daughter in BIO Girls?
Most girls struggle with a lot of things while growing up, and if our girls have learned a lot from BIO Girls then they will as well. BIO Girls is a wonderful investment of time and energy to help girls grow.
If you could have lunch with one person, who would it be?
Laura Ingels Wilder, to talk about what a day in her life would be.
What’s your guilty pleasure?
I love heavy cream in my coffee. Yum!
Thank you, Jessica, for your mentoring and commitment to the BIO Girls mission.
Learn more about how you can get involved! In fact, with our gala approaching, we have the unique opportunity for you to support BIO Girls. As a part of our Give A Girl A Voice gala, you can sponsor the programming costs for a BIO Girl gifting her confidence, encouragement and a voice.
Sponsor a BIO Girl here!